Two Fables by James Guida

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The Fall

In fact, it was God’s tactful nature that led to the Fall. Hearing Adam and Eve wax delusional about snakes and apples and even conversations he was supposed to have had with them, though he had obviously been far too busy at the time, he realized that the surfeit of leisure in Heaven had been a mistake. Not wanting to embarrass them, he sent them to their expected destination, Earth, that other prototypical place, hoping that there they might do better. An important side effect of all this, incidentally, was God’s hitting upon the idea for both apples and snakes.

The Popular Clone

The geneticist hated that there wasn’t time enough in life, and decided to clone himself — that way he would be able to keep working and go to the party, or on the same day off both see friends and fritter the day away in heavenly solitude. The idea was that he and the clone would later catch up and enjoy a feeling of wholeness, of not having missed out on anything. A certain and surprisingly lengthy amount of time passed, as the clone was made, educated, groomed. At his first party he was very much a hit on account of his novel origins: he told amusing stories about his master, was invited to things, made several acquaintances and found a lover. Pretty soon there were too many plans to keep track of, so the geneticist had no choice but to clone himself over and over, the result being that everyone was busy and he didn’t see much of any one of them, and more opportunities than ever were slipping away.

–James Guida is the author of Marbles, a book of aphorisms published by Turtle Point Press. He is currently at work on a book of fables. www.jamesguida.com

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