Ted Wilson reviews the World: Patreon

★★★★☆ (4 out of 5)

Hello, and welcome to my week-by-week review of the world. Today I am reviewing Patreon.

As robots continue to replace the workforce, the workforce is forced to work out a way to make money. Luckily for some, many new types of jobs have appeared in recent years, from taxi drivers who uses their own cars to computer screen prostitutes.

One of the most intriguing new models of employment is one where instead of a boss in a suit who watches his watch while you eat your lunch, your boss is a bunch of strangers on the internet who just give you their own money out of their pockets and the goodness of their hearts.

With the help of a librarian and two people who looked like teenagers I was recently able to get my own Patreon website page. Patreon is a website where you ask strangers for money in exchange for a job they never hired you for in the first place. You decide what your job is and strangers decide if they want to pay you for it.

Via Patreon I’m inviting you to become my boss for as little as $1 or as much as whatever it takes to put you into crippling debt. My salary goal is a collective one million dollars because I want a million dollars. At the time of this writing, I’m 0% of my way toward that goal.

Anyone who becomes my boss and pays me more than $5 a month will receive a personal review of themselves. DISCLAIMER: I can’t guarantee you will be reviewed favorably, but I will review you.

At it’s heart, Patreon allows people to put a literal price on how much they value a person’s life’s work. If Patreon had existed when Van Gogh was alive, he would have had zero patrons. And then he would have Photoshopped his ear off.

What am I worth to you? Nothing? Or something?

BEST FEATURE: The potential for all my financial dreams to come true.
WORST FEATURE: Internet access is required to pay me. There is no cash option. If you would like to pay me in cash, please call me at (617) 379–2576 and I will give you my address. I don’t want to put my address on the internet because I don’t want white supremacists to know it.

Please join me next week when I’ll be reviewing Wade Boggs.

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