9 Stories About Sports, Games, and Gamesmanship

Obviously, Electric Lit’s day-to-day work banter is full of intellectually high- and fabulously low-brow literary and pop-culture references. But we also spend a lot of time talking about sports. Our discussions run the gamut from the NBA to cycling because competition of all kinds makes for great narratives. Epic sagas that twist and turn for all nine innings generate as much suspense and thrill as stories about gambles rolled, shots taken, and competing truths.

In the sporting spirit, we’ve unlocked 9 stories from the Recommended Reading archives that capture the heat of competition and the thrill — sometimes sinister, sometimes exhilarating — of the games people play.

Baseball

Home Run” by Steven Milhauser

Recommended by Electric Literature

In a long, single sentence, Milhauser tells a baseball story that is as much about the charm of a certain kind of Americana as it is about the sport itself. As a ball soars through the air (straight through the galaxy!) the excitement and anticipation of the crowd watching seems to soar just as high. This is a story for day dreamers and baseball-lovers alike.

Basketball

On the Swish and Roar” by Kawai Strong Washburn

Recommended by Electric Literature

Sibling rivalry can have absolutely nothing to do with organized sport. This story opens with a bust-up between Dean, the star of the high school basketball team, his younger brother Noa, the brightest kid in every class he takes, and their mother. After the fight, when Dean’s performance takes a nose-dive in the run-up to a critical, college-scholarship-deciding game, this becomes less a story about sport, and more an examination of the identities we protect, and the positions we play in our families.

Gambling

Everything You Want Right Here” by Delaney Nolan

Recommended by Electric Literature

Gambling is not a sport, it’s a game of chance and luck, but the life of the gambler shares an important thing with the life of a sportsman: it is lonely. This Pushcart Prize-winning original fiction story is about a married couple living in the foreseeable future in a casino called Les Sables. Outside the adult playground, there is only desert, nowhere to go. Despite winning big on their first night, we find that Natalie, the woman, longs for a way out. And it is through her longing that Nolan brings loneliness to the surface.

Fetch

Ball” by Tara Ison

Recommended by Rick Moody

In the title story of Ison’s collection, the narrator, who lives alone in a big house with a jacuzzi, becomes obsessed with Tess, her cockapoo dog. Tess, meanwhile, is obsessed with her Ball — or balls of any kind — and insists the game is played during any and all moments: when her owner is trying to sleep, trying to have sex, or trying to soak in the jacuzzi. The narrator’s lover competes with Tess for her attention, and we, the reader get the creeping sense that our protagonist’s obsessive love for her dog might not be so pure.

9 Stories About Exploring Extremes

Chess

202 Checkmates” by Rion Amilcar Scott

Recommended by Daniel José Older

A young girl quickly becomes enthralled with the game of chess after her father teaches her the ways of the game. Of course, it’s also the time with her father and his undivided attention that she finds thrilling. When she finds a new competitor in the park — one who might be better than her teacher — more essential life lessons arise about sorrow, joy, cheating, and how we define victory.

Bullfighting

Mariachi” by Juan Villoro

Recommended by George Braziller Press

“The story investigates masculinity and authenticity,” writes Lexi Freiman, editor of Juan Villoro’s collection The Guilty, “using the beloved ‘national prejudice’ that is the mariachi.” It is an unfortunate truth that society often uses sport and athletic prowess as a means of affirming—authenticating, even — a man’s masculinity. Juan is a national celebrity with a phallic insecurity, a mariachi often compared to a bullfighter. Through superlative penis jokes and anecdotes about the excessive courtesy of porn stars, Villoro’s tale trounces stereotypes.

Baseball

Miller Field” by Tyler Sage

Recommended by Leigh Newman

There is something of reconciliation in true sportsmanlike behavior. James is a talented, high school baseball player training under hitting coach Stubbs Chapman—who is both aging and dwindling in relevance in the baseball world. The boy and coach have a tense relationship, each refusing to recognize the talent of the other. When James returns to the town at 42, he runs into his old teacher, rival, coach, and nemesis, and finds that they are finally teammates.

Hawking

The Pilgrim Hawk” by Glenway Westcott

Recommended by Michael Cunningham

Hawking is one of those activities that is somewhere between sport and game; you might say it lives in the same realm as “fish & tackle shops” or “rod & gun clubs” — but usually in Europe, not the American West. While Alwyn Tower, an American expat, is staying with his French heiress friend in her home outside Paris, an itinerant Irish couple arrive with their hawk, Lucy. The hawk is restless and sullen, and as conversation and wine flow, the story becomes a meditation on captivity and something sport does not always allow for: independence.

Rowing

Supernova” by Dani Shapiro

Recommended by Electric Literature

Parenthood involves many competing elements, not the least of which is the tug-of-war that between the wants of a parent, and the needs of a child. In this story, a father, Shenkman has built himself a man cave in the form of a sparkling personal gym. His rowing machine is his refuge where he takes out his frustrations: that he can’t cross the distance between himself and his son, and that he can’t beat the time of another rower, Lindgren, his college friend who owns the same rowing machine program. In fact, Lindgren seems to have a lot of things Shenkman doesn’t, and from there the seeds of competitive obsession begin to grow.

Piecing Together a Novel

Goodbye, Vitamin is Rachel Khong’s debut novel, and it holds an impressive amount of wisdom and emotion in its slim 200 or so pages. At the risk of sounding trite, I admit that this story of thirty-year-old Ruth and her year tending to her father as he transforms with Alzheimer’s truly made me both laugh and cry. Rachel Khong has skills.

The circumstances are relatable — aging parents, bad breakups, questions about the path of one’s career and next steps — but Khong’s delicate handling of this material brings new insights on every page. Over the course of small sections that are broken up by date as the year of the novel proceeds, Khong gives space to those mysterious moments in life that just can’t be explained, but that give life its meaning. And the characters — Ruth, her parents, her friend, and the graduate students who see Ruth’s father as a mentor — are distinctive and real on the page.

Khong, who lives in California, is the former Executive Editor of Lucky Peach magazine, and I was fortunate to meet with her in person in May at a Brooklyn café. She was in town promoting the final slated book publication from Lucky Peach, All About Eggs, which is part cookbook and part essay/anecdote collection. We discussed the connection between cooking and writing, the beauty of the short novel, and the questions debut women writers get asked all too often.

Catherine LaSota: Can you tell me a little bit about your history with food and your professional relationship to writing, and how the two merged?

Rachel Khong: I’ve been writing fiction for a really long time, but not because I thought I’d make money at it. Growing up, I always wrote fiction and did something else, journalism essentially — music journalism, features and other things. Writing for Lucky Peach happened very serendipitously. I headed back to San Francisco, and they were starting this magazine and needed help, and I love cooking. It was kind of a perfect situation, and so I joined, I think, in 2011, and that was when that whole career started.

CL: Food plays a pretty prominent role in Goodbye, Vitamin.

RK: Yeah, I think it plays a big role in my book and my brain, especially because it gives form to my days.

CL: I read your piece in Grub Street, so I feel like I know a little bit about your writing days and how much you eat prosciutto.

RK: (laughs) Yeah! Ha.

CL: But you also cook a lot yourself.

RK: I do, and that was why food writing made as much sense as it did. I got into cooking more when I was in grad school, for writing — it’s just kind of enmeshed and tangled together. It’s hard to separate those two loves.

CL: Can we talk about the genesis of your idea for Goodbye, Vitamin?

RK: The form of the book is a year. It came out of a short story that I had written about a similar character, I think her name was Ruth, too — she had the same voice — and I wrote this really short story about her dating an alcoholic fisherman, and that was the seed of how the book got started. I just loved her voice and wanted to be in it. She had a different life, but she had the same voice and sense of humor, and was in the same place in life, sort of feeling out of it and not really excited by her career or just various things in her life that had not quite worked out the way she wanted them to. So that was the seed of who the Goodbye, Vitamin Ruth was.

CL: What were you reading while this book came together?

Rachel Khong. Photo by Andria Lo.

RK: I started writing the book only because I realized that novels could be possible for me after reading things like Mary Robison’s Why Did I Ever — she was my teacher in Florida, too. Also Joan Didion’s Play It as It Lays; Speedboat by Renata Adler; Sleepless Nights by Elizabeth Hardwick. I was reading these books and realized, oh, I don’t have to just write short stories — that’s all I thought I was capable of doing, and I never thought that I could write a longer thing. Reading these really small books, often by women, I realized it is possible. If this counts as a novel, I can do this, too. If I can break it down into these little pieces that I can ultimately puzzle and fit together, it seems really doable. So that’s why I started it. I don’t think I would have been brave enough to start it if I hadn’t read those books.

To know that you don’t have to have this huge, plot-heavy tome spanning generations in order to count as a novel…I don’t want to say mine is as important, but small books can be just as important. Those books I remember way more than I remember anything by, I don’t know, Jonathan Franzen (laughs).

CL: He was totally in the back of my mind as you were talking about long novels.

RK: I love the books that get at the things that matter in a way that kind of dances around talking about them directly, because it’s almost more profound that way. I think there’s a tendency to over explain or over explore things or, on the other hand, to be very opaque about it. But I love that middle ground where it’s looking at hard topics but almost distrustful of over explaining something or trying too hard to get clarity.

CL: It’s like when someone asks, well, what is this book about? The answer to that is: you have to read the book! You have to get immersed in the form of it and the language of it, and language isn’t perfect enough to explain in one paragraph what it is about — that’s why you wrote a whole book.

RK: Yeah, yeah.

CL: That being said, I did see some themes emerge that I’d like to ask you about. Memory, for example.

RK: I was really interested in memory, and Alzheimer’s came in as a way to explore that, but I was also interested in breakups, or this particular breakup she’d had, I guess, and her trying to figure out why it had happened. And thinking that it must have something to do with the separate memories that each person has in a relationship — in any relationship, really. You’re bringing your own memories to it of this other person, of who you are when you’re with them, and when those memories are incompatible, or when one person remembers one thing and another person doesn’t, how does that work? I was interested in that in romantic relationships, but also with parents and kids, because there’s a huge swath of time that you can’t remember as a child, and your parents are very much remembering that as people, and so what is that about?

CL: Near the end of the book, there is a discussion about defining ourselves in terms of who we are in relation to other people, and to me this feels like something you explore throughout Goodbye, Vitamin.

RK: That’s interesting, I hadn’t really thought of it that way. I’m always into the ways we change from person to person. I think women have to do it a lot more than men do, right? I find myself wanting to respond to the other person, or there is that thing that you have with friends, where you start to mimic what they’re doing. Or, I start to talk a certain way when I’ve hung out with a friend for too long.

CL: Do you think there’s an empathy that women in particular have?

RK: Yeah, I mean, of course, yeah.

CL: Do you feel, having written a novel, like you have become exposed in some way?

RK: Yeah, I have been dreading the whole publicity thing. I don’t know, there are so many ways to be misrepresented or say the wrong thing. That’s what I’ve been worried about. It does feel like being exposed. I’ve gotten to hide behind food or whatever journalistic subject I’ve had for years now, and now I have a book out. It’s fiction, but it’s so personal, and these are things I think about a lot, and things I’ve stolen from ex-boyfriends…

CL: I think the question of, “How much of this is you?” is something that women get asked more than men.

RK: I think it’s really true! Especially if it’s a first person novel, and if it’s a debut novel, especially, oh, this must be about you!

CL: Right. But my response to that is, every book that every writer writes has something of themselves in it. Men, too!

RK: Yeah.

CL: Some people just don’t fess up to it, and that’s bullshit.

RK: It is bullshit.

Surveillance, Satire and the Female Body

CL: But this is not a memoir; it’s fiction. And people do need to respect that line. What’s the draw of writing fiction for you?

RK: Just writing in general, I love the puzzle of it, and to make something out of essentially nothing — it’s a very cheap and free endeavor. With fiction, the puzzle is so much more fun because you have all of these things to work with. In nonfiction, if you don’t have somebody saying the right thing, or if you can’t quite get an interview out of this person, then you have to put it together a different way. Fiction can just do whatever.

CL: Is fiction about control?

RK: It’s kind of about control, I guess. But also it’s just a lot more fun. You can be more surprised with yourself. There’s a part of it that’s not control at all, that’s totally something separate from you, like that inspiration thing we were talking about. Maybe you’re writing a scene about something, and then out of nowhere the perfect conclusion to it comes, and you’re not quite sure how that happened. A big appeal of fiction is to have those moments of, oh, this puzzle is figured out, and I didn’t even quite do it myself.

CL: But you did do it yourself.

RK: Yeah, everyone should take credit for what they’ve written, but there are those moments that feel like dictation. Like, oh, this moment I didn’t overthink, didn’t overwork, is actually the better thing — I should just trash the rest of this!

CL: The age thirty shows up in different ways in your book. It’s the age that Ruth’s father was when her parents met, and it’s also the age that Ruth is herself during this story.

RK: She used to be younger, she used to be like twenty-six or something, and then I realized as I was working on it that I was kind of aghast at her. I was like, no, you are so young, this doesn’t even make sense, why are you so sad about your job? Of course you are figuring it out! Thirty is still young, but I think there is that external pressure (at age thirty), too, and I wanted her to feel that about herself. It was just less convincing to me as I was getting older myself, as I was working on the book.

CL: I find that is true with essay writing, too — over the course of time (sometimes years) you spend writing the work, your relationship to it changes, so at what point do you know it’s done?

RK: Part of it was being sick of it, right? (laughs) Part of it is needing to finish it, because I feel like a really different person than when I started it, but that’s what the book is about, too — the really different versions of ourselves we are over time. I’ve always been the kind of a person who is really good at — and this isn’t a good thing about myself — really leaving people or places behind if I’ve grown in a different direction. So I’ve lost touch with a lot of people. I have lots of close friends, but I haven’t gone back to a lot of places I’ve lived, because it’s not how I function, I guess.

CL: Does they feel like different segments of your life?

RK: Yeah, I guess it’s like segments of life, or it’s hard for me to remember what it’s like to be in college or something. It’s hard for me to reconcile all these people I used to be with the person I am now. Not that I’m so evolved, or whatever, but I think there’s a different kind of person — my husband is like this — where he views himself as just one continuous person. He can remember really well what he felt like as a boy who was really short and growing out of that and now being a normal height; he can see the person he is now in the person he was then, and vice versa. I can do that a little bit, but I wish I could do it more. I wish that my narrative was so continuous. For me, it’s like, I used to be this person, and now I’m this person, and in five years maybe I’ll be not so much like her. Like I won’t understand her problems anymore, I guess.

CL: So it sounds like you have to write another book now! The way you talk about the stages of your life makes me curious if you are really good at throwing shit away.

RK: No. I guess that’s surprising based on what I just said. But I have a lot of shit in my purse, like Ruth. And I definitely am a nostalgic person, but I wish I were more a person who could look back and say, oh, I remember that, and I see how that moment transformed me into the person I am today. I feel like I can’t grasp life in that way — it doesn’t seem that comprehensible to me. I’m just always trying to figure out shit in the moment, constantly. And learning from mistakes is its own challenge.

The Monster of the Green Lake

Continue reading Episode 6: A Hidden World
Previous Episode: Episode 4: A Very Odd Occurrence of Birds

1. Before Shelley made it to the bend of trees that led to the lake, an indecent fog had set in, obscuring everything but the enormous wooden sign:

Green Lake: No swimming after 8 p.m.

Fishing with license, in season.

She braked with a sudden jerk, feeling the bike chain seize, then go loose. That always happened when she hit the brakes too quickly. She climbed off, setting the bike on its kickstand, and knelt down to inspect the chain.

It had come off. Shelley swore lamely and stood, looking around, seeing that the strand of red-and-pink yarn led to a tall weeping willow. She crept over and found that the yarn had been double-knotted around a single, low limb, with several loose strands hanging down. The girl, Jamie, had left some kind of object tied to one of these strands. It was an extremely small silver key, the kind from a locket or diary.

Shelley reached out and touched the key, quietly untied it from its loop, and placed it in the pocket of her coat.

Behind her, she suddenly felt something moving. An irregular shadow of some kind appeared and quietly faded away. “Hello?” Shelley said, trying not to sound nervous. She turned to face the fog. “Hello? Who’s out there?” she said into the darkness.

The only sound was that of the lake, ageless, almost placid.

“Hello?” she said again. “Is anybody there?”

Out of the low, green fog came an unusual creature — fearsome at first, then absurd: the Monster of the Green Lake.

Shelley stood up and nervously backed against the tree, unsure of what was standing before her.

The monster was over six feet tall and was really just someone in an enormous rubber suit, the shape of which resembled a cross between the Loch Ness Monster and a child’s idea of a dinosaur. The suit looked several decades old, its rubber skin flaking, with wide cracks around the elbows and knees. From a panel near the center of the monster’s chest came a labored sound. Shelley did not know if it was trying to speak. It sounded like “Hpmph” or “Hello,” but she continued to back up.

“Who are you?” she asked.

“Hmphraphm?” the monster replied.

Shelley took a step forward, and the monster stopped moving. “What do you want?” she asked. “Who are you?”

The monster tried to remove its gigantic mask, lost its grip, tried again. Finally, it came free, and the face of a boy, roughly 20 years old, with reddish-brown hair and squinting eyes, appeared.

“Who am I? I’m the monster of the goddamn lake. I’m practically the mayor of this town. That’s how much personal charisma I happen to have. Let me guess. You came up here to get your picture taken? It’s 10 dollars. Fifteen if you actually want me to stand in the lake.”

The boy spoke so fast it was hard to know how to answer.

“No, please.” The girl said, shaking her head, recognizing him from somewhere. “Wait a minute. I know you.”

“Of course you do. You used to be friends with my little sister, Anne,” the boy said. “I’m Junior. Junior Hanford. You know Anne. Anne with the cleft lip. You used to come over and have sleepovers and play ‘light as a feather’ at my house on Friday nights. You even sent me a Valentine once. Then you decided you were too good for me. Went on to boys in your own grade.”

“I don’t remember that,” she said with a half-grin.

“Well, I’m sure you don’t. You were a lot younger and a whole lot nicer then.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means what it means. I saw you walking into church, and you acted like you didn’t even know me.”

“I probably didn’t see you.”

“If that’s how you want to play it, kid, it’s okay by me. What are you doing up here by yourself anyway? The entire town’s in a panic. Everybody’s out looking for that girl, or didn’t you hear?”

“I know,” Shelley said and leaned against the tree. “What are you doing up here?”

“I got a job working for Mr. Dupont. I’m a night clerk at his motel. The one by the highway. He asked me if I wanted to make a few extra bucks this week, for Founder’s Day. People come by and get their picture taken, that sort of thing. But nobody’s been by in the last few hours.”

She felt her hopes suddenly dashed.

“Did you ever hear the story of when Grant Dupont first spotted that thing?” he asked.

“Only a thousand times,” Shelley said with a frown.

The boy ignored her, his voice suddenly becoming practiced and exuberant. “On September 15, 1953, a quiet summer evening, Mr. Grant Dupont, of Somerset, Illinois, was alone in his boat fishing when, all of a sudden, a tremendous tidal wave erupted from the center of the lake, and a gigantic green creature reared its head above the waves. Mr. Dupont just happened to have his camera with him, and he snapped a photograph, which revealed the monster’s strange, fearsome shape. And that’s what happened right where you’re standing. The Monster of the Green Lake.”

She rolled her eyes. The boy noticed and grinned.

“Mr. Dupont asked me to memorize all that before he gave me this costume. I did it in a couple hours. I have, like, a nearly superhuman memory. It’s uncanny, really. I scored so goddamn high on all my intelligence tests that the army almost didn’t let me in. Made me a communication specialist. Boy, was that ever a mistake,” Junior said. He reached behind his shoulder and tried to unzip the costume. He struggled for a few seconds, then stopped, too proud to ask for help.

“I’m supposed to stand around here until 10:00 in case someone wants to get their goddamn picture taken, but nobody’s been around the last couple of hours. I guess they’re all at home, talking on the phone to one another about what happened to that girl.”

“It’s terrible. I…you didn’t see her up here by any chance?”

“Nah. I mean I’ve seen her up here before, swimming with a few of her friends. Or just sitting back by that tree. But not today. I guess it was too hot for everybody.”

Audio: “Star Witness” | A Story in Seven Parts

Shelley gave a slight nod. “I came up here because I thought maybe she was here.”

“No. Nobody here but us monsters.”

She gave a false laugh, and knelt down, going back to fixing her bicycle chain.

“What’s wrong with your bike?”

“The chain always comes off when I stop too fast.”

“Need any help?”

“No, thank you.”

The boy shrugged at this and examined his rubber-suited glove.

“Hey, what time is it anyway? I ought to be heading up to the motel pretty soon.”

She gave a quick look at her wrist. “Almost 10:00,” she said.

“I don’t mind working at night. I start at eleven and get off at seven. I don’t sleep very much, but the pay is decent.”

Shelley kept working at the bicycle chain, fitting it back among the sprockets. “That sounds awful.”

He tried to unzip his rubber suit again but was unable. “No, I like it, actually. I do a room check every couple hours. I just poke around the motel, make sure there’s no trouble. Mostly closing people’s doors, turning off the outside lights. I like it because I get to look into people’s rooms every night.”

“You look into their rooms?”

“Sure. It’s the best part.”

“What do you see?”

“It’s mostly people sleeping, some of them watching the TV. Sometimes you see a couple fighting. My favorite one was one night, about three in the morning, I was walking around, and I see this naked woman, and not that she was ugly—she was just a regular woman—but she was naked, and it made me stop, so I kind of crept up close and looked in the window, and she went and lied down in her bed, and there was a naked man in there, too, and I thought, well, I know what this is, but then I looked and there was a baby between them. It was the whole family, and they were together in bed, sleeping. Like they were at home. It was one of the best things I ever saw. You know, I didn’t expect to see that baby there. That’s what I like about that job. I’m always seeing things like that. People forget that they’re in public, you know. They always end up surprising me.”

Shelley thought of what it must look like, the shadows and light, the stillness of the near-empty room, the sound of something no one else would ever see. “That sounds lovely,” Shelley said. Junior looked deep into her eyes, and then quickly glanced away.


2. By then, Shelley had gotten the chain back on. She wiped her greasy hands on the slick, dark grass and dried them with her skirt.

Shelley stood upright and faced the boy. “I should be going,” she said.

“Sure, but first, can I ask you something? I see you singing in the choir in church sometimes. How come you like singing with all those fuddy-duddies?”

“I don’t know. It’s just something to do. I started going with my grandma.”

“I like to watch you sing. Because you stand in the back row, and you think nobody is noticing you. You think everybody is watching Amy Talbert. So sometimes you roll your eyes at her.”

Shelley felt her face go flame red. “I never do that.”

“Oh, sure you do. You do it all the time. You are a champion eye roller. I used to think you had to be practicing at home. I bet you were afraid nobody was noticing you. Was that it? Let me ask you this: You still got a beau? That fellah with the rough older brothers?”

“Who, Wayne?”

“That’s him. You still go around with him?”

“No. I mean sometimes. Not seriously or anything.”

“Not seriously. Well, that’s good.” He smiled. “You know I’d like to know what you like about him.”

“What?”

“I mean why do you like him? His personality, the kind of car he drives, his big old dumb glasses, what?”

“I just like him. He’s nice to me. And we work together at the diner.”

“Wow. He’s nice to you. And you work together at the diner. You got awful high standards.”

“You’re one of those people who think they’re smarter than they actually are, aren’t you?”

The boy grinned. “I don’t know. Probably. I guess that’s a pretty accurate way to describe me.”

“Don’t you think most girls find that annoying?”

“Usually. But I don’t have much interest in most girls.”

“Oh, and why not?”

“Because there are a lot of girls in this town who don’t know how to do anything but yammer on and on about who said what or who wore a dress one size too small. None of them have an interesting thought in their awful little heads. There’s nothing the least bit surprising about them. And besides that, I mean, most of them don’t even know how to kiss. Or what’s supposed to come after that.”

“Which you have all figured out, I bet.”

“You bet right. I’ve made up a whole new way of kissing.”

She smiled and quickly remembered why she was standing there in the dark, at the lake. The boy, Junior, tried to unzip his suit once more but could not get his arm around behind him.

Shelley could not help but laugh.

“What’s so funny?”

“I’m sorry. Nothing,” she said.

“Go on and laugh,” he said with a mock frown. “You know I thought about calling you up sometime, but I still haven’t made up my mind yet.”

She laughed even louder. “I’m sorry. I should go.”

She looked over at the red-and-pink strand, saw where it ended by the lake, and took hold of the handlebars of her bicycle.

“Oh, I get it. The cold-shoulder routine. I know how it works. I got three sisters.”

“That isn’t it. I just have to be going.”

The boy shrugged unhappily.

“Before I go, do you mind me asking?” Shelley quietly whispered. “Are you sure you didn’t see that girl up here tonight? Earlier today, maybe?”

“Yeah, I’m sure.” He itched the side of his sunburned nosed and said, “Come to think of it, the other day, maybe a week or two ago, I was on my way home from the motel, walking back through the woods, and I saw her. Jamie Fay. Out by the cemetery. It was early. Maybe close to six or seven in morning. And she was out there, by herself, sitting by those Civil War graves, by the one that looks like the Washington Monument. It’s funny. It was like she had already disappeared, the way she looked sitting there. Like she was practicing being a ghost.”

“The cemetery? You saw her there?”

“A week or two ago. It looked like she was waiting on somebody. But then a police car pulled up. Someone from the sheriff’s office must have driven her home. I haven’t seen her out there since.”

She nodded, coming to a decision. The boy looked at her and smiled slyly.

“You thinking of going out to the cemetery by yourself?” he asked.

“No.” The sound of it was so clearly a lie that both of them chose to ignore it.

“You’re braver than you look. But you ought to leave all of this to the sheriff.”

“I will,” she said. “Thanks for your help.”

“Maybe I’ll see you around sometime.”

“Maybe.”

“Maybe next time we can practice rolling our eyes at each other.”

“Maybe.”

“Goodnight.”

“Goodnight.”

She quietly reached over and helped the boy unzip the back of the rubber suit. He smiled shyly. Shelley rode on once again, pedaling into the dark.

Two miles away was the new cemetery, with its slanted iron gates. Shelley paused as she passed through, finding a white ballet flat, a generic one from the failing shoe store, placed on one of the finials of the cast-iron fence. She climbed off her bike and took the shoe in hand.

There, along the grayed instep, were the missing girl’s initials.

JF.

She looked up when she heard something move.

Before she could make a sound, Shelley saw the outline of someone’s shape blocking her path.


Continue reading Episode 6: A Hidden World

Electric Literature is Looking for Readers!

Calling all fiction lovers! Electric Literature is looking for new manuscript readers to join our editorial team. Recommended Reading publishes one story per week: a mix of original, previously published, and forthcoming, with an personal foreword by another top writer or editor to every story.

Because Recommended Reading receives a large volume of submissions, a committed corps of volunteer readers is essential to helping the editors find new, unknown, and/or diamond-in-the-rough talent. Recommended Reading is the weekly fiction magazine of Electric Literature, an organization dedicated to making literature more relevant in popular culture.

Specific responsibilities of the role include:

  • Providing concise but thorough responses to ten submitted manuscripts per week, with a clear YES or NO recommendation for each
  • Meeting weekly reading deadline, and clearly communicating with editorial staff when scheduling conflicts arise
  • Closely reading Recommended Reading and other similar journals, with an eye toward the shape of contemporary short fiction

The ideal applicant is:

  • An avid and attentive reader
  • Self-motivated and able to meet deadlines
  • Able to express herself clearly in writing
  • Very familiar with the Recommended Reading back catalogue
  • Educational and/or professional experience in literary criticism and fiction writing is a plus, but not required.

This is a volunteer position that requires a commitment of approximately six hours per week. Readers will work remotely and on their own schedules (as long as they meet the weekly deadline).

Current readers are not allowed to submit their own fiction for consideration in Recommended Reading.

For a sense of the kind of stories you’ll be reading, visit the Recommended Reading homepage here.

To apply please email a cover letter and a two paragraph critique of a short story published in the last month to editors [at] electricliterature [dot] com by Monday, July 24th, 2017.

The Loneliness and Disenchantment of the Alligator

They decided to call the alligator Minnie only after she’d laid nine eggs, late in the summer of 1952. For all of her 54 years she’d never been given a name because no one knew her sex. But then she revealed herself, her hopes deposited in the sand.

Alligator babies like the ones Minnie hoped to have are around six gangly inches long at hatching, mostly legs and tail, their green brown armor unformed and soft. Their vulnerability makes them seem cute, like they would make good pets, and it’s tempting to put one in a box and try to keep it.

In the 1880s, a number of baby alligators were put in a box and sent to El Paso, Texas, a city that lies on the edge of the state, the country, and the Chihuahuan Desert. They took up residence in a pool downtown, in the middle of a park called San Jacinto Plaza. Alligators, including Minnie, would live there for around 80 years.

The pool was surrounded by streetcar lines and major avenues intersecting, not far from the train station and the international border. It was a place people passed frequently, a place on the way to somewhere, and many stopped at the pool for a moment to peer in and wonder. Alligators, after all, are modern dinosaurs, having dwelt on earth for some 150 million years. This is bound to appeal to the imagination. How strange to think we could possess them. What a special thing to see in the middle of a dusty desert town.

Alligators are not particularly fearsome hunters. Their method is to wait and lurk, preferably in a covered place where they can’t be seen, until something edible moves nearby. Then they lunge. They feed.

But alligators don’t eat very often; they can go up to two years without eating when they have to. Lurking and stillness take up much more of their time.

So alligators do not entertain. However appealing the babies might be, the adults bore us. We can, for a moment, admire their prehistoric bearing, but before long we wish they’d do something.

The El Paso alligators were motionless for so much of the time that some people began to wonder if they were even real. A few would throw rocks or lit cigarettes at them to try to get a reaction. Two alligators died from stoning. In the 1960s, the remaining gators got moved to the zoo. The enchantment was gone from the plaza; the desert held one less mystery.

If only the doubters had been there the day after Minnie laid her eggs, when she was, according to the local news, “as active as a tiny sand lizard.” Her keepers tried to cover the eggs with dirt to protect them, but Minnie wouldn’t let anyone near. She was probably too old for them to hatch but kept her guard up anyway, pacing in the fading desert sun.

“Four Corners of Sunday,” by Ellen Welcker

Double Take: ‘The Epiphany Machine’ Takes Tragicomedy Into Terrifying New Corners

 “Double Take” is our literary criticism series wherein two readers tackle a highly-anticipated book’s innermost themes, successes, failures, trappings, and surprises. In this edition, frequent Electric Literature contributors Kyle Lucia Wu and Tobias Carroll discuss David Burr Gerrard’s The Epiphany Machine.


The eponymous Epiphany Machine central to David Burr Gerrard’s novel is marketed to the world with the slogan, “Everyone else knows the truth about you, now you can know it, too.” What does it actually do? It tattoos revelations to your forearms. It seems like a baffling device, little more than a cult, until people realize it actually works. The main character, Venter, is no different and falls into the drama surrounding the device and its operator, Adam Lyons. Then stuff gets even weirder.

Spoilers are encouraged and fair-warned, with the hope that readers purchase the novel and join the discussion in the comments.

Kyle Lucia Wu: So there is a lot of talk about “breastfucking” in this book. It is Epiphany Machine owner Adam Lyons’s seemingly preferred mode of sexual activity (though we never see him engaging in it, simply talking about it). He tries to argue at one point that it is a perfect form of sexual interaction, and Venter, the main character, points out that there is no pleasure for the woman in breastfucking. What do you think this says about Adam? That he’s only concerned in singular pleasure, not mutual? Something Oedipal?

Tobias Carroll: I’d like to say that that’s par for the course for Adam, who seems paradoxical from the start and keeps adding contradictory aspects as the book proceeds. He’s deeply committed to the workings of the Machine and is decidedly principled about it; yet, by the end of the novel, it’s revealed that (mild spoilers, though I’ll try to be vague) his precise ethical standards have a couple of significant exceptions.

So maybe “breastfucking” is something of a reflection of this. It is, in the words of Deadwood, ”A lie agreed upon.” Or something emblematic of Adam’s successful attempts to convince himself that, no, this is totally mutually pleasurable for all involved, when in reality, it’s not.

“We can’t just know a little bit. We need to know everything.”

I suppose that circles around to one of the big questions of the book: Did you walk away with the impression that the Epiphany Machine did more harm than good? I keep going back and forth on this question, which is a pretty great representation of the layers on which the novel works. Is the Machine, ultimately, a force for ill? Is it more of a relic of a bygone era that no longer has a place in this century? It’s a pretty powerful symbol — even as its role in a relatively realistic novel borders on the metafictional. Layers on top of layers.

KLW: I do think it does more harm than good ultimately, but not in a malicious way. There’s a limit to what we should know about each other, and a point where knowing the truth is no longer useful. It reminds me of the Black Mirror episode, “The Entire History of You,” where everyone has video chips in their heads that record their memories to the point where we can replay any interaction for ourselves or others. Of course there’s reasons why this might be helpful — what exactly did my boss ask me for when I wasn’t listening? — or just replaying a certain memory — but it’s very easy to see how downhill it could and would go. Suddenly you can’t trust anyone’s retelling of their memory unless they play you the exact video so you can see for yourself. The Epiphany Machine is the same.

In the beginning of the book, having an epiphany tattoo is looked down upon and thought to be part of a cult. Then they start to be interesting, maybe personally revealing: Lots of people don’t know themselves, so it becomes pretty alluring to be able to be told the truth about yourself without all that pesky self-investigation. By the end of the book, they’re largely required. The problem is that with any kind of illumination like this, I don’t think humanity can handle only having it in small doses. We can’t just know a little bit. We need to know everything.

In the end, it’s brought up that political pundits have suggested the next presidential candidates must get epiphany tattoos and show them on the debate stage. It might be interesting to imagine what 45’s might have been. But a good point this brings up is: Would it even matter? If we all get used to seeing so much truth, would seeing the bad truths become normalized?

TC: The morning I’m typing this, 45 has tweeted a video in which he assaults a wrestler with the CNN logo for a face, so–as much as I’d like to think it could make a difference, I suspect it would be normalized. Though I’d also love to see what epiphany tattoo attack ads would look like. Maybe “love” is too strong of a word: I’d be morbidly curious to witness it in an alternate world, but I’d be terrified about it in this one.

Talking politics also calls to mind Gerrard’s first novel, Short Century, which also engaged with a host of political issues, albeit in a very different way. It, too, had subplots about alter egos–which means that we might be getting into to the realm of preferred authorial themes. Did you find any areas in which the two books overlapped?

“It should also be said that Gerrard is committed to giving us flawed, potentially unlikeable narrators at the forefront of each of his books, something I love.”

KLW: I love digging into an author’s preoccupations. I see a lot of parallels with Short Century and The Epiphany Machine: a lot politics, a lot of anger, and a lot of talk about persuasion. I think Short Century tells its story with more rage. The Epiphany Machine is told more passively, because of its very different narrator. Venter’s opinions are fairly changeable and muted — after all, he is very dependent on the opinion of others. In Short Century, the narrator, Arthur, seems to strongly believe that he understands others better than they understand themselves — he’s very confident in his own empathy. Now that I’m saying that, it sounds like the idea behind the Epiphany Machine. “It knows you better than you know yourself!” Maybe there is something that connects empathy and epiphanies. It could be argued they are there so you can feel empathy with yourself: Once you know your biggest secret, you can accept it. Or is it to feel empathy with others, by having them reveal their biggest flaw upfront?

It should also be said that Gerrard is committed to giving us flawed, potentially unlikeable narrators at the forefront of each of his books, something I love.

Also — incest? At the forefront of Short Century is the reveal of the narrator’s incestuous relationship with his sister. There isn’t any incest in The Epiphany Machine, but I do think that the way he blurs the lines between Adam, Rose, Venter, and Isaac does mar the traditional familial lines, and points to a preoccupation of boundaries in families.

TC: I absolutely agree with you on that. I also don’t think it’s coincidental that both of Venter’s father figures have names that are pretty loaded with Old Testament connotations: Adam as this primal father figure (which he succeeds at with respect to the Machine, but is less successful at with actual people), and Isaac, whose paternal role ends up being more pronounced with trying to help Ismail than with Venter. I don’t know. It very much seems in keeping with a novel about people being literally assigned roles and stations in society and wrestling with whether or not to live up to those.

Double Take: Dan Chaon’s ‘Ill Will’ is the Darkest Novel You’ll Read This Year

KLW: That’s a great point that parallels with the epiphany tattoos themselves. Once they get it on their forearms, they then have to decide whether they are going to keep fulfilling their tattoo or whether they’ll go against it. I mean, Isaac’s tattoo was should never become a father, and he deliberately became one.

“Once you know your biggest secret, you can accept it.”

How do you feel about the use of history (9/11) or real people (John Lennon)? I’m not a huge Beatles fan and John Lennon doesn’t hold much personal significance to me, but I was wondering how I’d feel if it had been about a musician I feel close to in my head. Do you think the choice to use a famous person in a narrative is risky because it may anger or alienate readers, or do you think it’s smart because readers already have an investment in this character?

TC: I think it works in the case of Lennon in a way that it might not have with, say, George Harrison. Some of it might be that (especially in recent years) Lennon has emerged as a much more flawed pop cultural figure — the fact that we can discuss him being abusive, for instance. And the fact that his killing has also (like it or not) become somewhat mythologized–I’m thinking back to the movie from a few years ago where Jared Leto played Mark David Chapman, and (if memory serves) Salman Rushdie’s The Ground Beneath Her Feet also contained a fictionalized riff on Lennon’s death. Tying the Epiphany Machine to the Beatles, and making it a sort of magical-realist distillation of a certain aspect of Boomer culture, clicked for me.

The point at which the book began to focus more on the abuses of the US post-9/11 took a little bit of time for me to process–a sense of, “Oh, this is where this is going.” That’s a little more immediate for me: I was living in New York at the time, and I think I’m always going to have a complex relationship to descriptions of that event, and that point in time, in fiction.

“I’d be terrified to get an epiphany tattoo IRL.”

That said, the way the Epiphany Machine leapt from cult Boomer relic to adjacent to American paranoia ultimately worked for me–it was something of a narrative leap, but it clicked. And the section about two-thirds of the way through, where nearly every epiphany ends with but is stronger than terrorists seemed like a perfect (and unsettling) evocation of the early years of the Bush presidency.

…though I was also impressed with how that section threw a whole lot of ambiguity into the narrative about whether the Machine was actually doing Adam’s bidding or if it was genuinely tapping into the user’s subconscious–or some sort of collective unconscious.

KLW: That’s a very interesting point that was never clarified. If Adam’s not in control of the machine, how would he possibly fix that on every arm? I tend to think it’s pointing to the way our collective unconscious wraps its arms around a certain idea.

There’s a point that’s glossed over around the middle of the book where Venter refers to thinking as a drug. “Thinking, like any other drug, can be a useful distraction from pain.” I think that’s actually a large part of this book, that thought is a kind of danger the way a drug is.

TC: And it also goes into Gerrard’s running concern over the dangers of ideological extremism, the characters who are seduced into acting on behalf of abusive governments in both of his novels tend to have thought way too hard about things, and end up causing abundant harm for others as well as corrupting themselves…

KLW: Several sections of this book deal with Stephen Merdula’s fake book that has several different explanations for how the Epiphany Machine came to be (thereby making all of them void). Several of them are also the testimonials that Venter takes from people who have used the epiphany machine. I loved the testimonials from people and found them pretty fascinating, especially because they’re often not at all objective — they believe in their epiphanies or don’t, and that shows completely in their storytelling. They’re saying “It changed my life!” or “It changed nothing” — completely skewed by their own opinions. How effective did you think these interludes were in the narrative?

TC: It clicked for me. Ultimately, this was a novel that was set in a world pretty close to our own, but with a very slight dose of surrealism. But for the Epiphany Machine to work and not just feel like a decidedly clever symbol or narrative device, getting a sense of how it might fit into people’s daily lives makes a lot of sense to me.

I can also say that, having thought about this a fair amount since finishing the book, I’d be terrified to get an epiphany tattoo IRL.

KLW: I think I’d be wildly curious about what mine would say, but not brave/reckless enough to have it embedded in my arm.

TC: Am I crazy for seeing Adam Lyons as a weird fictional analogue for Michael Seidenberg of Brazenhead Books? (Which I suppose would also make this slightly-alternate New York a close cousin to the slightly-alternate New York of Jonathan Lethem’s Chronic City, which I’m totally in favor of.)

KLW: I love that reading of Adam. I think Adam is a bit more of an antihero than Michael, but there seem to be parallels in personality and in their business models (both more interested in spreading wisdom than gaining money). And the Upper East Side apartment. (And wasn’t Jonathan Lethem one of Brazenhead’s first Brooklyn employees?) This is a wonderful reading of Adam’s shop for many reasons.

A brazen head historically was an automaton, a brass head that could speak to its owner and answer his questions — a magical object that somehow knew more than the humans it was interacting with. The epiphany machine is a perfect, albeit more aggressive and permanent stand-in for that. There were always dangers to a brazen head, whether it reflected hubris, allowed you to misinterpret the answers, or maybe just told you too much about yourself — and this certainly falls in line with the theme of thinking or knowledge as a drug. There is a danger to knowing your epiphany through this machine, many layers of danger in fact, just one of them being that everyone can read it on your skin.

TC: Over the course of the novel, Venter moves from an enthusiastic acolyte of Adam’s work to a more oppositional role–to borrow the essential punk term, he’s pretty much a corporate sellout. And he betrays his best friend in a pretty horrific fashion. So I’m curious: Do you think the narrative lets him off too easily by the end? To an extent, it seems like Ismail needs to suffer for Venter to have a more genuine epiphany; on the other hand, this is a novel with a premise and structure that question the role of epiphanies.

KLW: That’s a very good question that I struggled with as well. Does Venter deserve to end up with Rebecca in the end, and baby Rose? Does he deserve to have his parents reunited, arguably the most common fantasy among young children whose parents are separated? What he does to Ismail seems like such a betrayal not least because Venter seems to know in his heart that Ismail is innocent, though he does go back and forth about what he knows to be true and what he has convinced himself to be true.

I think the fact that his loyalties seem to sway so wildly (and we see this with all his primary relationships in the book: Rebecca, Ismail, Adam, his father) is just another indicator that Venter genuinely doesn’t know how to think for himself, what his epiphany predicted, but his epiphany just made him more uncertain. Sometimes he tries to push against his epiphany just because he knows he has it, but this backfires as well.

Do you think that this book is arguing for epiphanies or against epiphanies? I think an epiphany is another thing we can clutch onto for some sense of identity, the kind a job or any role in society can provide. But anything we hold onto too tightly like this, anything we expect to get all the answers from, ends up being way more of a crutch than anything else. It’s dangerous to believe too sturdily in almost anything — even, or especially, something about yourself.

TC: I’d go in the “against” camp, myself. Nearly every prominent character who gets a tattoo ends up regretting it. Ismail’s tattoo destroys his life; Venter’s provides a means by which authority figures can manipulate him and by which he can hold off on taking responsibility for his own actions. Epiphanies seem to me to be best when they’re temporary: That great insight you have about yourself one day might no longer apply to the person you are a month later, and trying to cling to that is like a more sophisticated version of wearing your high school varsity jacket when you’re pushing 30. (Or 40, or 50.) It’s essentially arguing that, on a fundamental level, you’ll never change from the person you were when you had that realization–which is a deeply dangerous proposition.

Agatha Christie’s Letters Reveal the Author’s Fantastically Sassy Nature

Plus a new bookselling technique hides covers, and George R.R. Martin was apparently not on board with a major GOT decision

The weekend awaits, and this Friday is teeming with literary news. Turns out, Agatha Christie dealt her fair share of sass in correspondence with publisher Billy Collins, blind-date-with-a-book asks readers to take a chance on coverless book-picking, and George R.R. Martin apparently wrote a future for one of his characters quite different than what played out on the show.

Agatha Christie gets sassy in these unseen letters to her publisher

Apparently, Agatha Christie had quite the temper. New correspondence between the English crime novelist and her publisher Billy Collins reveal her sometimes hot-headed responses and protestations. In one letter, she is displeased with the cover for The Labours of Hercules, claiming the Pekingese on the cover was not up to standards. In another, she expressed her anger over seeing her books in shops despite not having received her own copies and being told its publication date. “I do think it’s treating your authors disgracefully,” she added. Yikes. Still, the relationship between Collins and Christie was also one of appreciation and admiration. Often, they would ask each other for favors: Christie asking for tennis balls (Collins’ brother was a tennis player) and Collins requesting that Agatha host his friend. In fact, Collins even bought Christie, his most profitable author, a car in 1953 to express his regard. These letters, plus unseen photographs of the author, will be on display at the Theakston Old Peculier crime writing festival (July 20–23) and then will move to Christie’s former home in Devon.

[The Guardian/Danuta Kean]

Blind-date-with-a-book entices with words only

We all know the ‘you can’t judge of a book by its cover’ maxim, while valid, is nearly impossible to enforce. Until now that is. Book Culture, a bookstore on the Upper West Side of Manhattan has come up with a brilliant way for people to shop strictly for the sake of words. Blind-date-with-a-book is a new book-buying experience, in which employees pick lesser-known titles, wrap them up in brown paper, and write a list of books of the same genre with overlapping themes. Since the new strategy was introduced in October, it’s been a hit — especially during the holidays. Blind-date-with-a-book has been increasingly popping up in bookstores and libraries around the country. Here’s hoping this book-picking is more successful than most blind dates are.

[Fox 5 NY/Stacey Delikat]

George R.R. Martin had different post-Red Wedding plans

Sometimes the author does know best. [Fair warning: some spoilers ahead] In fact, if George R.R. Martin had gotten his way with Game of Thrones, the grace and class that is Caitlyn Stark would still be leading the Stark clan instead of probably unceremoniously abandoned somewhere after her brutal slaughter. In the novels (which are pretty behind the show’s plot at this point), Lady Stonehart is the resurrection of Catelyn Stark, brought back to life after the Red Wedding by the Lord of Light. Well, the showrunners had different plans for Lady Stark and decided that leaving her bloody body behind would do. In an interview with Time, Martin describes the disagreements he had with the show’s creators about which route the plot would go. (Martin preferred sticking with the books, obviously). “In my version of the story, Catelyn Stark is re-imbued with a kind of life and becomes this vengeful wight who galvanizes a group of people around her and is trying to exact her revenge on the Riverlands. David and Dan made a decision not to go in that direction in their story, pursuing other threads,’’ he said. All in the name of good TV-watching, I suppose.

[Forbes/Paul Tassi]

Literature Needs Angry Female Heroes

Ted Wilson Reviews the World: Goodbye, Vitamin

★★★★★

Hello, and welcome to my week-by-week review of the world. Today I am reviewing Goodbye, Vitamin.

The rejection of modern medicine has been in vogue lately, like the anti-vaccination movement or the lesser known practice of putting other people’s poop in your butt — an idea thrust into the mainstream with this scene from Miranda July’s Me and You and Everyone We Know:

For this reason I had assumed Rachel Khong’s Goodbye, Vitamin to be a pro-scurvy manifesto, and I was excited to see what benefits a lack of vitamins might offer. It turns out Goodbye, Vitamin isn’t about that at all, according to the blurbs on the dust jacket. And once I have time to sit down and read the book, I will update this review.

For now, I will tell you everything else you need to know about the book. It’s by author Rachel Khong, who has pretty amazing teeth. I’m guessing they are either digitally altered or she lost them all as a child, and what I’m seeing is the result of many hours spent with a top-tier orthodontist. They’re great teeth!

Typically an author’s appearance is irrelevant, but Ms. Khong’s teeth were such a distraction I stared at them for over an hour, and was only able to look away when I blacked one out with a marker.

Now if you’re a lemon fan, you’re going to love this book. There are lemons all over the cover! And if lemons aren’t your thing, there’s another version of the book with a banana on the cover. If you don’t like lemons or bananas, I suggest removing the dust jacket and drawing your preferred fruit on the book itself. You can draw a durian or whatever.

Currently the book is only available in hardcover, but the cover isn’t that hard to tear off if you want to save a little space on your bookshelf. Unfortunately what is hard to do is to tear off the cover without also utterly destroying the rest of the book. I ended up having to buy a second copy.

If you’re no sold yet, famous person Khloé Kardashian recommended Goodbye, Vitamin, and that’s more than enough for me. Is it a coincidence that Khloé and Ms. Khong share the same KH consonant pairing, or is it a subtle clue that they are actually the same person? I have no way of knowing and neither do you. Not every mystery needs to be solved.

BEST FEATURE: This book reminded me to buy vitamins.
WORST FEATURE: If you drop the book on the floor it is very likely to spill open to the end and ruin the ending for you.

Please join me next week when I’ll be reviewing milk.

TED WILSON REVIEWS THE WORLD: MY BODYGUARD

Late Night at the 24-Hour Bodega

By Tracy O’Neill

Presenting the seventh installment of The Bodega Project, where authors from across New York reflect on their communities through that most relied-on and overlooked institution, the bodega. Read the introduction to the series here.

“How is it possible you aren’t in the NBA?” I ask the man behind the deli counter. He is Amir Mothna, six-five, thirty, with fresh braids and a Metallica T-shirt. His cousin Nasir says all Amir’s brothers are this tall. All eight of them. But Amir doesn’t have time for ball. It’s been two, three years since he took time off because it, this deli at 47 Kingsland Avenue, a straight cut across from the Cooper Park Houses in East Williamsburg, is his, and work is different when it’s your own. He doesn’t have time to even watch the playoffs, and still, I think, he is trying not to smile, secretly a little pleased to know that this is how he’s seen: as a guy who ought to have a sneaker endorsement. But it can be hard to tell with him. He’s got the facility to dead out the expression on his face with expertise arrived at in over a decade of bodega life.

I have come to the deli to know him — an assignment that is difficult to convey to Amir when he asks what I have in mind. There are words like “profile,” but they never quite landed in my explanation a few days before. Yes, him. Writing in the world about his life. For a moment, his eyebrows knit together, Amir as incredulous as the moment, later, when I would ask what the object is he hands to a boy across the counter, and the object is a Fidget Spinner: but all the kids have them. In the end, what happens is I stand on the customer side of the deli counter while Amir works, a Plexiglass counter stuffed with candy and Black and Milds between us.

Outside, the north-facing wall of the deli has a memory for death. Or lives, depending how you look at it. You’ll see Bowie there and Prince, Whitney, a spray paint memorial with a trash receptacle done up to resemble a boom box like someone’s dad’s idea of a joke about the garbage on the radio these days. Turn the corner, and the pictures become egg sandwiches. There’s a bulletproof glass lazy Susan for the late-late of a twenty-four hour establishment. And inside, there’s Amir’s cousin Nasir and him. There’s the chef, too. The music is Leaf singing about playing the block like a Tetris game, the aisles are two, and no, there’s no alcohol. There are individually packaged slices of pie.

To arrive at the bodega at 47 Kingsland is for me a matter of two blocks, but the guys from my corner mostly don’t go there. There are two delis on my corner, one so close to my apartment they share a fenced-in quadrangle of refuse, so close I call my stoop the deli annex. I’ve been living in the building for seven years, so I have come to expect the cloth director’s chair on the sidewalk, the parade of coordination of the sort where kicks are always a color-synecdoche for the outfit. I know that when one cries for his dead boys, the other will be ready to talk about the brains of something he believes in called The Man Upstairs. I know the opinions about Lady Gaga’s face, made and unmade, and I know the corner shit-shooters’s critique of the boys you see over the unofficial line where Jackson Street cuts through. They say over there, it gets ignorant. It gets young. And to speak of ignorance, of youth, is, for them, to speak of unnecessary violence with some resignation and also some forgiveness. They are only boys.

But there are no boys now. Now is a Sunday night lull. That will change in an hour. Amir knows the rhythm of when the place will grow bristly with customers or slide out into emptiness. He has theories about populations in time. A rush means the end of a good television show: they obsess, tight to their TV set, and then when it’s done, stomachs announce their dearth. Time to eat.

It’s hard for him pick out the reasons exactly, but Amir figures maybe eating is part of why he got into the deli business, or food anyway. He says he likes to prepare it. When he was a kid, he’d help his mom in the kitchen. She isn’t Yemeni like Amir’s father, but she learned to cook what Amir calls “culture food” from their neighbors in Detroit. His favorite was aseed, a flour and water dish served with rich soup. After he moved to the city in 2005, he went to work at his cousin’s deli in Rosedale. Now there is this place, his and his family’s, and maybe he doesn’t distinguish much between the two when you get down to it. It’s impossible for Amir to answer questions about himself without mentioning family. When I ask what his great dream is, he says that his sons, now four and ten, will go to college, or at least the older one who is less a pain in the ass. When I ask what he does for fun, he says he goes to see relatives in Queens. When I ask how he’d describe himself, he says the task is too difficult but agrees with me that probably Nasir has some ideas in response to the inquiry.

It’s impossible for Amir to answer questions about himself without mentioning family. When I ask what his great dream is, he says that his sons, now four and ten, will go to college, or at least the older one who is less a pain in the ass.

Nasir, after all, is a little more prone to framing identity. The last time I was in the deli, he told me in the neighborhood he’s known as Daddy. He was grabbing my 9-volts and recovering from one of the radiant women who torture him endlessly, recreationally, giving his rap in a nasal drawl.

“Big Daddy, no. Little Daddy. But still, I’m the Daddy.” The man who bags groceries nearby entered the store. “George, George, tell her what they call me,” Nasir called out.

“You, papi chulo?” George said. “Daddy.”

“You see,” Nasir said. “I take care of people.

But there is not time to ask Nasir about Amir because then the door swings open to accommodate a man in a white T-shirt and a woman with a baby in the stroller. For the first time all night, Amir’s face bursts from stoicism, a stunner of a smile with all its generosity and kinship feeling. The man in the white T-shirt, you see, it’s been a minute. They roll that fact around for a while, and then Amir tells the man about a shooting near his other store in Bed-Stuy. What’s happening is face-to-face news, news in the style before newspapers, before feeds feeding Mark Zuckerberg.

“Booming?” the man in the white T-shirt says.

“Four times.”

The man drifts deep into the store where food is prepared. This is the way of deli conversations, the way they come in and out through space, words distributed along pathways of chicken wings and paying up, entrances, exits. I ask Amir about the shooting, and with an affect like a prolonged shrug, he says, “A lot of people got shot.” Amir remembers three or four shootings outside the deli. One was two years ago, when the building was still shared by a laundry operation. What it was was a shot through the window of the Laundromat, metal through glass, metal through the belly at 11:47 AM. The gunman had visited the deli first, cranking his voice around in a fake accent and wearing a black mask. After he was asked to leave, he made a small gesture with his finger and there was a man on the floor.

I ask Amir about the shooting, and with an affect like a prolonged shrug, he says, “A lot of people got shot.”

I think about how he must worry. I think about his wife who he met in Yemen. He’d go to visit the family of his father’s friend, and there she was, this young woman. There was a form to it, manners. Sit with the family. Take in the intelligence of the room. Her family, they’re doctors, lawyers. Alone was not an option. That would come later. He would discover this woman had a way of listening. She didn’t like outside food. She liked to cook. She was trained to nurse people in their homes. And one day they would have a life together, two sons, meals of aseed by her hand, trips to Queens. How, when the shots are fired right outside the deli façade, could he not worry?

But Amir says he doesn’t. He’s used to it. He invokes Detroit. He says a store like this isn’t even possible there. And more locally, it’s worse in East New York, Brownsville, or over where his other store is in Bed-Stuy.

“You got Three Oh Three, you got Sumner, you got the Brevoort,” he says, iterating beef. And then after a little while, almost to himself, he muses. “Niggas don’t fight anymore. They shoot. I don’t know why.”

And perhaps it is this that makes me wonder if he fantasizes about the alternatives. Not just games for tall men but dentistry or social work, plumbing or teaching or playing the keys. It is not only anomalies of violence but the eight, nine, ten, twelve hours of serving people, how Amir says, composed, matter-of-fact, with some people the only way to convey that you are respectable is to speak rudely. But when I ask what Amir would do if he didn’t own a deli, he pauses for a long while. It’s almost as though he’s never considered the answer, though he did work for a time in construction.

“Grocery store,” he says finally.

“If you didn’t have the deli, you’d own a grocery store,” I repeat. At first, I think this must be his dry sense of humor. But no — yes — he’d own a grocery store. They’re bigger.

Because perhaps from the outside, what this life looks like is someone’s forearms resting on the counter, bills covered by loose hands. Bodies shape up to variations on waiting. Someone leaning against a row of Nilla Wafers, phone waist-high. Someone looking to whoever is behind the counter for faster, no that one, no not that but that. And sometimes because there is a woman pitching her voice, there are men wheezily laughing, men muttering about her mental health, and those behind the counter, going a little crazy themselves, throw their arms up, turning away, turning back to mutter or else pacing, singing along with the radio, I need me a li’l baby who gon’ listen. Girl I don’t wanna be the one you iggin’, though ignoring is exactly what he’s trying to do.

But from the inside, you look around and say in the same manner as three-fifty or five dollars, “You got to have patience and strong heart, that’s all.” From the inside, this is what you see: around nine, Teddy and Johnny Boy come in. Teddy pretends he wants a job, and you pretend to be vicious. You tell him no. You tell him he’s unemployable because of his big, fake butt, and you can do that, gun for the laughs, because you’ve known him since he was a kid, when you were first opening your store and he was a little guy down at eye-level with the candy display. Now, he’s twenty, sauntering in with a flashy belt everyone in the store asks about, old enough to mess around with. You can say you watched him grow up.

Johnny Boy gets wrapped up in one of the Fidget Spinners from the jar on the counter. It gets Teddy to thinking about all the toys that meant you were the shit he’d almost forgotten. Those yo-yos with the lights and the little skateboards, what were they called, Tech Decks.

Now, he’s twenty, sauntering in with a flashy belt everyone in the store asks about, old enough to mess around with.

While he waits for hot food, Teddy comes over to the counter, points.

“What’s this?”

“A recorder. I’m interviewing him. He’s going to be famous.”

“You know I been famous,” you say.

“He already got the money.” Teddy pauses. “Are you doing a record deal?” And because he’s old enough to give shit now too, he says, jutting his chin toward Johnny Boy, “That one, he’s a bad influence on the store.”

And maybe even though you know this is joking around, when Teddy begins to offer a total exposé in exchange for one thousand dollars, when he declares that this, in fact, is his store, his and yours by partnership, you think maybe what’s happening is not strictly sarcasm, that the humor derives from its aspirational nature and also the shading of partnership that feels already true or rhymes with truth somehow. Because though maybe part of the appeal of the deli is that it’s yours — not like Chrysler, where your dad worked, where they laid all those people off and left Detroit to be boarded up and drained — the store, it’s not only your own. It’s the block’s too, the same way the picture of yourself rises up from parcels of information about your family.

When asked about challenges, you can’t really think of any, or at least you don’t mention them. You don’t agree that it must have been difficult to open the store. You recall that they were pleased to have a twenty-four-hour setup on the block, and you’re baffled by the question, “Who was happy?”

“The community,” you say.

A woman comes in with her own chilled wine glass for the Snapple she intends to purchase. Then it’s the man with the polite daughter wearing an on-point flight jacket. She wants to hold the Fidget Spinner too, just like all the kids, and you know one of these days she’ll walk in a woman, and you’ll remember when she was four foot-something, asking her dad for the cherry gummies, that weird little toy everyone used to have. And even though what’s now in her hand will already be memorabilia, the Sunday night chat of regulars will remain, as big and familiar to you as the faces of icons painted on your walls.

About the Author

Tracy O’Neill is the author of The Hopeful, one of Electric Literature’s Best Novels of 2015. The same year, she was named a National Book Foundation 5 Under 35 honoree, long-listed for the Flaherty-Dunnan Prize, and was a Narrative Under 30 finalist. In 2012, she was awarded the Center for Fiction’s Emerging Writers Fellowship. Her writing has appeared in Granta, Rolling Stone, The Atlantic, the New Yorker, LitHub, BOMB, Vol. 1 Brooklyn, The Literarian, New World Writing, Narrative, Scoundrel Time, Guernica, Bookforum, Electric Literature, Grantland, Vice, The Guardian, VQR, and the San Francisco Chronicle. Her column Body Language appears in Catapult. She currently teaches at the City College of New York and is pursuing a PhD at Columbia University.

— Photography by Anu Jindal

The Bodega Project – Electric Literature

— The Bodega Project is supported by a grant from the New York City Department of Cultural Affairs.

What the F**k Is a Beach Read, Anyway?

Come summer, recommending books is a high-stakes game. The right story collection can make a vacation, just as the wrong novel can drive you out of the comforts of a seaside cottage, wandering the streets like a madman in search of entertainment at the mini golf course, the tiki lounge, or that candle-pin bowling alley where a man lost a hand the year before last. And so the publishing industry — not just the houses, but the magazines, the booksellers, the list-makers — have come up with all sorts of coded language meant to guide these seasonal reading choices, terms that frame the matter as a lifestyle decision masquerading as a literary sub-genre that nobody knows quite how to define. Which brings us to the $64,000 question of July:

What the fuck is a beach read, anyway?

This time of year, no other literary term gets thrown around quite so loosely. But what are the parameters? What are the goals? What makes a book suitable for reading on sand in salted air with flesh and paddle sports all around? The answer, no doubt, depends on the recommender and the person doing the reading. We decided to go to another source: the authors.

We asked 8 authors who may (or may not) have been surprised to hear that their books had been included on various summer round-ups and asked them to interrogate just what’s going on. And to be clear, this was no exercise in snobbery. We’re taking this question seriously. (Too seriously, one might argue, but after all this is summer and we’re in search of pastimes.) We asked these authors to think about what a beach read is, what it could be, what it all means, and whether their books (and the books they love) might in fact benefit from a little exposure to sun and surf. The responses we received ran the gamut from celebration to condemnation, reverie to dread.

So, the next time you find yourself heading to the shore and in need of a good summer read, first ask yourself the important epistemological question, what the fuck do my favorite authors think a fucking beach read is, anyway?

Featuring Edan Lepucki, Courtney Maum, Alana Massey, Gabe Habash, Rachel Khong, Patricia Engel, and Sarah Gerard.

A Gracious Book, Likely to Incite Pleasure…

Edan Lepucki, author of Woman №17, California, and others

If you’ve ever been to a beach you realize that people are reading all sorts of things: someone’s got the new Elin Hilderbrand and someone else’s got a James Patterson mass market; there’s that dude reading Shantaram, that elderly lady over there’s got a Bible, and that teenager is reading James Baldwin. I’m always stunned by the diversity of books I see in the wild. For publishers, however, “beach read” is a quick way of saying, “You’re going on vacation so here is a novel that will offer you what you most want from vacation: pleasure.” Of course, what makes one reader purr with delight makes another fall asleep, but for marketing purposes, pleasure here is synonymous with a compelling story and a kind of invisible prose that gets you from one chapter to the next without you noticing the syntax or imagery. But that is a narrow definition, as is my vague idea of those who actively seek out these sorts of books: readers who consume them like candy, one after the other after the other, or, those people who don’t read at any other time of year. (It’s that second group, the one-book-a-year folks, who turn a book into a phenomenon: think Gone Girl). Many novelists simultaneously bristle at this category — My work is not breezy! Check out my similes! — while also hoping to be the book that everyone reads on vacation. My new novel has been called a beach read by quite a few readers and critics, and I’m fine with that label: it means my novel has the power to engage a reader who is sitting before an enormous, stunning body of water, and still decides to look down at a piece of paper with a bunch of words. What they find there better be fun.

It means my novel has the power to engage a reader who is sitting before an enormous, stunning body of water, and still decides to look down at a piece of paper with a bunch of words.

Courtney Maum, author of Touch, I Am Having So Much Fun Here Without You, and others

There are two kinds of unexpected guests: the plus one who shows up with a laundry list of food sensitivities and backhanded “compliments” about your boho-chic décor, and the gentle wit who presents a bottle of Chablis and a bar of salted chocolate along with his excuses. Having had them both over, I know who I want back. Chablis and chocolate guy was witty and entertaining, and he helped with the dishes. The category “beach reads” is a lot like that of the unexpected houseguest — it’s about the experience of inviting something new into your life. It connotes something delightful and relatively risk-free, but that doesn’t mean that it is “easy.” Let’s do away with this word, “easy,” and try instead “a gracious read.” Because the beach read can be sardonic, but it is never crass.

A Transformation, Preferably En Route to an Island…

Alana Massey, author of All the Lives I Want

I see the prevailing wisdom around what constitutes a beach read is reading that encourages you to indulge in escapist impulses and fantasies, things like murder mysteries where you play detective or juicy memoirs from above-average-looking sluts where you play the above-average-looking slut. This makes sense considering that going to the beach is generally an escape from the doldrums of your work and home routines, unless you’re a lifeguard or some sort of cavalier sting ray. But I think a more generous view of the beach read would encompass books that don’t just let you escape but that guide you to some sort of actual transformation that you don’t snap out of. The heat of the sun and the rhythm of waves is conducive to letting your guard down, making you receptive to new ideas presented in nonfiction or self-help books or inclined to empathy for characters you might otherwise despise. You should take a beach read’s message home with you, like a tan and sea-salted wavy hair. I’m delighted that All The Lives I Want is considered a beach read because I think that signals that my book is for a broad audience, as I aimed for a reasonably clever accessibility over an impressive esoterica. The book is pop culture criticism but some of its central themes are about living in a body and navigating being a woman in a public space, creating the potential for a more potent visceral experience considering how heightened those realities are on the beach. Also, a lot of readers have told me they cried reading it, which is great at the beach because you should be wearing sunglasses anyway AND if you do get caught, you can blame salt water or sand in a way you can’t if you start crying on public transportation or into the physically short but emotionally gaping distance between you and the person or people you live with.

The heat of the sun and the rhythm of waves is conducive to letting your guard down, making you receptive to new ideas presented in nonfiction or self-help books or inclined to empathy for characters you might otherwise despise.

Gabe Habash, author of Stephen Florida

In grad school I met some friends at Coney Island. It was a long train ride, so naturally I brought along the book I was reading at the time, which was Ulysses. My friends met me on the boardwalk and immediately made fun of me when they saw me carrying it. All of which is to say that I think a “beach read,” if it means anything, is a book that you really want to read that you now have the time and mental energy to read. This summer I’ve been working my way through short books: Morgan Parker’s There Are More Beautiful Things Than Beyoncé, Jean Rhys’s Good Morning, Midnight, Thomas Bernhard’s The Voice Imitator, Patrik Ouředník’s Europeana, Ryu Murakami’s Piercing, Lily Tuck’s Sisters, Iris Owens’s After Claude, and Heinrich Böll’s The Lost Honor of Katharina Blum.

California Soul: A Literary Guide to SoCal Beach Towns

Rachel Khong, author of Goodbye, Vitamin

Until very recently, a “beach read,” to me, meant any book I held aloft while lying in discomfort, distracted by heat or sand or overhead Frisbees, peering up at and trying to comprehend but not succeeding, feeling stupid from the sun. It was a book inevitably ruined by water. But when, last fall, my husband and I began planning a trip to Greece, I decided I was going to have to learn to read on beaches, so help me God. We would be traveling between islands by ferry, and could each only bring a small carry-on. So I packed a Penguin paperback of War and Peace — a book I figured would last me the entire week-long vacation, and then some. Over the course of the trip, the book fell slowly and dramatically apart. It lost its cover early, so I didn’t even get street (beach) cred for reading War and Peace. (We joked about affixing the detached cover to some random thriller.) Anyway! It turned out to be perfect, improbably: tiny, dense type that somehow, by being physically difficult to read, became easier to follow. A cast of characters I could be languidly enraged or delighted by. And prose that could be rambling, yet beautiful… like the very beach itself? I’m actually just talking through my (sun) hat now, so I’ll simply leave you with this: if you hate reading on beaches, try War and Peace!

A Seasonal Delusion…

Patricia Engel, author of The Veins of the Ocean, Vida, and others

I live near the beach and rarely see anybody reading there, no matter the time of year. Most beachgoers are flat on their backs, eyes closed to the sun, or talking to the person next to them, drinking, listening to music, snapping selfies, minding their kids as they play in the sand or waves. Books bought with the best intentions of being read on these long, bright summer days remain tucked in bags with the emergency aloe. But I suppose “beach read” sounds better than “sofa read,” “lunch-break read,” or “doctor’s waiting room read.” In the end, giving a book such a luxurious alias doesn’t say much about the book. Just what we think our lives should look like.

In the end, giving a book such a luxurious alias doesn’t say much about the book. Just what we think our lives should look like.

Sarah Gerard, author of Sunshine State, Binary Star, and others

A beach read is a book that is made of the beach. The covers of beach reads are sand packed into wet towels left to bake in the sun. The pages are made of dried seaweed — so when the blurbers say they’ve “devoured” the book, that is to be taken literally. Inside, the stories are all about people going to the beach, mostly women, usually in small groups, so as not to scare off potential husbands. Not much happens on the beach, so unlike the ocean, the conflicts don’t run deep.